morraha's blogs

The Kidnapping. Part 4.

August 21, 2012

His legs were screaming from the exertion. They had kindly taken over the job when his lungs were unable to carry on with it. Skidding into a warehouse he ducked behind the door and peeked back the way he had come. The coast was clear so he paused to try and regain his breath, hoping he had finally lost her. He had never seen anyone so tenacious, or fast! How the heck did she follow him so easily with only one eye?

Limping further into the warehouse looking for cover the thief granted himself the luxury of griping heartily about the nerve of That Woman. He was a sneak thief for crying out loud! He was trained to move casually, and smoothly, not attracting attention to himself. All of which is the exact opposite of tearing through the streets like he was participating in the running of the bulls!

The sound of a quiet snicker broke through his thoughts and sent his gaze darting wildly. His crepe soled shoes glided stealthily over the floor as he turned in wary circles, heading further into the darkness. His breathing was loud in his ears and the echo of his footsteps seemed to come from everywhere at once. Wait a minute… crepe soles don’t echo! Every hair on his body stood at attention at the sound of a chuckle.

“Don’t you just love acoustics?” Whispered a low voice in his ear. Leaping away like a startled rabbit he turned to face The Woman. A strange green glow came from the dial on her eye patch, cutting through the dusty gloom of the old building. She focused it on him and for a fleeting moment he thought of alien abductions and idly wondered if she carried a probe in one of those holsters. The sharp click of her boots snapped him out of his daze and he ran again, careening into bolts and bales in his hurry to escape.

The Woman laughed at him and grabbed a nearby chain to hoist herself into the rafters. Following him overhead she watched in amusement as more and more items tumbled and fell around him conveniently blocking off all but one route of egress. Really this was too funny, the lout made it so easy that she really didn’t even need to bring the Ninja. But why deprive her of joining in the fun? Settling back against a beam The Woman enjoyed the thief’s growing frustration.

This was insane! Boxes were toppling left and right without him being anywhere near them, he would never escape at this rate. Pausing to attempt to regain his breath and bearings he again heard the heavy click as her boots met the ground. She stood between him and the one remaining avenue of escape. The green glow of her eye patch had been replaced by a focused red beam that was centered on his face. “Is this what a deer feels like?” Was the thought that chose to flash across his mind.

The light left his face and the dial of the eye patch began flickering as though various images were flashing across it. The light stilled and he was jerked out of his stupor when The Woman spoke again.

“So, you are Cristiano The… Spectacular?”
He wasn’t so sure he liked the sarcastic tilt of her eyebrow as she said that.
“Your Criminal record shows that you have indeed committed dozens of robberies”
His chest swelled a bit at that.
“Oh and got caught in the act every time. “
His shoulders slumped at that.
“I suppose you could call that spectacular, in a sense.”


He didn’t have to take this abuse! Deciding to make a break for it he sprang to the left, intending to rush her blindside and break through. But before he made two steps he was falling, his entire body encased in, cling wrap? What the heck?! The Woman laughed and waved her thanks to a shadow that quickly disappeared. Sauntering over she squatted in front of him, removing her eye patch to give him the courtesy of her full gaze and said;

“Well, Mr. The Spectacular I am Agent M of the Biffle Brigade. And if you had only kept your appointment with me earlier all of this tediousness could have been avoided.”
“All of this for that lousy hat?”
“Yes, now where is it? Mr. Adolfo would very much like to have it back.”
“Give me my money and maybe I’ll tell you.”
“Now Cristiano, that isn’t a very polite tone of voice you’re using. And I don’t really think that your current position includes bargaining rights.”
“Either pay me or cut me loose but I’m not giving you squat for free.”
“Are you quite sure you want to take that tack sir? All that is required for you to go free is the return of what you have stolen.”
“Shove off lady. Just wait til I spread the word about you around the streets. You’ll be sorry then.”
“Oh yes of course. Because your reputation is strong enough to withstand the stigma of being brought down by a girl with a cling wrap shooting Biffle Gun after all.”
“…”
“Are you alright? You look a bit green.”
“Shut up.”
“I will as soon as you tell me where to find Adolfo’s hat.”
“I said I’m not saying anything without pay.”
“Are you positive on that point sir?”
“…”
“Very well then”

Reaching for her holster Agent M pulled out a long slender barreled contraption with the impressive INTERROBANG‽© insignia running along its length.
“What the bloody heck is an INTERROBANG‽©?”
“Don’t worry. You’re about to find out.”
And leveling the shiny silver barrel at his face, she pulled the trigger.