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Site is VERY slow, reason why I'm not here .....

Alone

Thoughts are chasing each other
Cycles of useless old obsessions
So tired, I am too damn tired
To silence all the questions

A little girl's voice inside my head
Keeps shouting 'to be strong' at me
We can do it, WE will not give up
I've never felt so lonely, WE???

Tried for so long to do it on my own
It's hard to ask for help or care
And even though I learned a lot
Even most of my friends are unaware

Really, I don't blame them here
They are in their own combat zone
I send out little hints and messages
Elusive, so I end up on my own

A pair of strong and loving arms
A hug, a warm and gentle touch
It will not 'solve' my life's challenges
But it is what I need so much



Comments

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Posted by frederiqueroy70 on July 07, 2012

Congratulations on your BLUE XPRESS feature!

Posted by terrapanthera on July 07, 2012

Thank YOU Fred! Much, much, muuuuuuuch appreciated! xxx

 
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Posted by jannina on July 07, 2012

Congratulations on your feature. Well done. :)

Posted by terrapanthera on July 07, 2012

Thank you so much! :-)

 
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Posted by jethro61 on July 06, 2012

Congrats on your feature! Nicely expressed!

Posted by terrapanthera on July 07, 2012

Thanks for taking the time to read it Jethro, I appreciate that! x

Posted by jethro61 on July 07, 2012

You are most welcome Annemieke!

 
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Posted by lordtemplar on July 06, 2012

Congratulations on your Feature

Posted by terrapanthera on July 06, 2012

Thanks Chris, I'm very happy with it. xx

 
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Posted by rodeorose on July 06, 2012

MIEK CONGRATULATIONS YOUR WRITING HAS BEEN FEATURED COURTESY OF XPRESS HOST FREDDIE ROY AT THE BLUE FRIDAY LOUNGE!!
You are invited to post your comments and Featured Work at the link to the BLUE FRIDAY LOUNGE in the next 48 hours, and join us in some fun & conversation at weeks’ end among friends at the BLUE Lounge… http://groups.bluecanvas.com/BLUE/forum/post/2814

Posted by terrapanthera on July 06, 2012

Ahhhh, so nice!!!! I feel honored! :-)

 
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Posted by lianne on June 29, 2012

I've never felt so lonely...WE? Oh my God, Miek...I say this every time, I know, but it seems as if you write my soul every time you put pen to paper. Exquisitely human, touching, needful (as we all are) and very beautiful, my friend. xoxox

Posted by terrapanthera on June 29, 2012

Thank you, you are such an inspirator you know!! Lots of love to you xxxx

 
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Posted by frederiqueroy70 on June 28, 2012

Me too! I'm sending a BIG virtual hug. My arms are pretty strong. No, seriously though. Your poem is touching and I can relate to what you are writing. It can be difficult to ask for help, we often equate it with weakness, but in fact, it takes courage to reach out out to others....

Posted by frederiqueroy70 on June 28, 2012

Please post to the XPRESS when you have the time!

Posted by terrapanthera on June 29, 2012

I'll do that, thanks sweetie! And for the BIG hug! XOXOX

 
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Posted by mttmaliha on June 23, 2012

I hope a hug from many miles away will be a hug just the same. I try not to 'hint' about what I need anymore. I think of the wasted time I spent doing that. when really-- the people i hinted to would not have understand if I had mashed them one with the obvious! Hang in there. I appreciate you! i do xxx

Posted by terrapanthera on June 23, 2012

I think I felt it ;-) Thank you dear Maureen. I am slowly learning to ask for what I really need and that feels good. Specially because I start to realize better what it is that I need. xxxxx

Posted by mttmaliha on June 23, 2012

funny how it works that way :-) xxxxx

 
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Posted by fortinero on June 22, 2012

...anne...something strange...really happen rigt now..I did not that you write,and I was so depress and lonely,sad,well that is nothing new,but a force,entity,power or simple casualty....take me here.....and I read this....no less then a dozen times,and I'm speechless,and I don't even goin to thank you...I'm walking out of here in a total different mood,not happy...is not a matter of happiness,but tall,confident,with an 'aura' of protection that people can 'see' that I'm a good and lucky person now...and a few tears roll down to my chest...left a salty taste in it....memory is a powerful as ever....

Posted by terrapanthera on June 22, 2012

Now you make me cry, you beautiful man! Letting it out made me feel better too, but it makes me happy that it gave YOU something! Big hug from Holland my dear friend, you are not alone XOXOX

Posted by fortinero on June 22, 2012

....not anymore -_-

 
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Posted by rodeorose on June 21, 2012

Big triple hugs from the gang here dear Miek- Taka, Mick and I- watch out.... they are very sloppy!! Just so happy to see you write again XXX

Posted by terrapanthera on June 22, 2012

Hya Rosie! Writing is soooo cathartic :-) Plus ... a friend came over immediately, she heard me, listened to me and let me be ... me. Made me feel better! But ... the more hugs, the better, so THANK you !!! xxxx

 
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Posted by lianne on June 21, 2012

Sweet Miek - what we really need to do, my friend, is learn to let go, not to dwell, not to beat ourselves up with our own pain or loneliness. It can seem so very lonely...those thoughts, those questions and no answers that don't bring more pain. I'm so glad you had a friend in whom to confide and to give you that human comfort too. Like Ramon - I'd hug you if I could but can only send loving thoughts your way and a pseudo hug. But this poem...I don't think I've ever read a piece you've written that I couldn't relate to or that didn't make me cry in recognition of myself. xoxoxo

Posted by terrapanthera on June 21, 2012

Somehow, Lianne, writing these poems helps me to not get stuck in these kind of emotions. I used to bottle everything up, and then release it with a big explosion of anger..... My friend just listened and said it was quite normal that things were getting too much and that she and her partner would love to take some weight of my shoulders if needed. That was very healing.

Posted by terrapanthera on June 21, 2012

Oh, wasn't ready yet ;-) ... And the last thing I want to do is make you cry sweetheart, but I get the point :-) xxxxx

 
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Posted by ramonfernandez on June 21, 2012

Oh Miek a human touch can calm so much. Wish I could give you a hug in person. Just know Im thinking about you and love your writing so much. You convey such emotions.

Posted by terrapanthera on June 21, 2012

I am fortunate with my friends, Ramón, you as well! xx My close friend Thirza came by tonight to give me a big long hug, let me ramble for a while, give me another hug and ... now I feel much better :-) And to get it out on paper, that helped too. Thanks Ramón! xx

 
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