A Day In My Office.
December 08, 2011
I can feel my tongue, conscious of it sitting heavy in my mouth like a small bit of lead. I feel the longing to speak, the desire to let words go tripping and babbling across its surface to fall like the sparkling diamond drops of a cascade. I wish I had my friends with me, then we'd all speak and laugh and give our tongues free reign to make merry and mine would feel light as a feather and fleet as a fox once again.
Instead I am in my office, my office mate is friendly but work dampens the wit and makes it dumb. So instead my tongue sits still and the urge to dance shifts through my mind and fingers. Now they are twitching, seeking words to spill out, anywhere. Tap dancing across my desk in search of a pen, stuttering across my keyboard trying to decide which collection of letters to play with next.
I have such mental cabin fever that I can't get my mind to settle in coherence. My thoughts gambol and jump and bicker with each other til I can't sort one idea from the other. One moment I swear my mind is dreaming up a cool sandy beach....that suddenly melts into a memory of cracking pecans with leaves in my hair when I was twelve.
I hear the slow tick of the clock's hand and I twitch again. Remembering the office I once worked in that was so silent I nearly screamed. Not even a wall clock to break the monotony of it. The air system chose to work so well that even the steady unceasing subtle rush of air was only just audible enough to sound like a lullaby. The memory is enough to lull me again and my eyes try to drift closed.
There goes the phone. I am distracted for few minutes. But as soon as they hang up I am back in my daze again. The washed out pallor of the sky cloaking as the sun slinks away, ashamed of her inability to set my piece of the world ablaze like she always loves to do. My tongue clangs heavily against the floor of my mouth again, and my fingers idly dance once more.
The clock keeps ticking slowly. Far too slowly, the riot in my mind growing ever more heated til at last I close my mind and let the real world fade out completely. The world of my thoughts and memories taking its place and setting me loose until the clock strikes the final bell and I am free til the next morning.